I think it was the birth of Miete when I really felt my love for Christopher grow exponentially. I imagine that is the case for most women. You have a child that comes from both of you, and therefore really connects you and makes you a bonded family. That a man can see his wife in such an unattractive, and icky state, and cling to her with such admiration amazes me. I'll spare the details of my graphic and horrendous first labor, but Chris didn't leave my side for 24 hrs except to take restroom breaks. He barely ate or slept and looked as emotionally drained as I was physically. It hurt him to see me suffer like that. That made me love him so much more. With each new child he has been my strength and support, although he has toughened up some over the years and been able to remove himself a bit from my suffering.
Life is not always easy, in fact we have had our fair share of struggles, and I'm sure we will have more in the future, but I am thankful that in most circumstances Christopher and I see eye to eye. We seldom argue or disagree, and I know this is not because of me. Any minor bad feelings are quickly remedied because my Christopher is humble enough to apologize to me and avoid further discomfort. I am not saying I am always right, I am just saying he apologizes first because he is the better person. Christopher always says "A happy wife is a happy life."
Christopher and I became great friends before there was any romantic involvement. We loved the same music, doing the same things and just generally had very similar tastes and styles. I think that is one thing that has attributed to us continuing to get along so well. We are best friends. We still love to go to concerts together, and live an active lifestyle. We love the same art and share cultural and political views, although Christopher knows a lot more about that stuff then I do. We love to have fun together, and we laugh all the time.
I am a relatively insecure person, and for at least the first year of marriage I would watch my husband sleeping or playing his guitar, and wonder how I got so lucky. What did I do to deserve such a fantastic husband. I wasn't exceptionally clever or good looking, I had no great talents. Just the fact that someone like him could love me really built my self esteem. For the first several months together I wouldn't let Christopher see me without make up on, even when I wasn't feeling well. Crazy, I know. I have long since gotten over that, although I still try and look nice for my husband.
I know this may sound cliche but I truly believe that to have any kind of successful friendship or relationship you must treat the other person how you wish to be treated, and you must be the person that you want to be with. It sounds simple, and it should be. Christopher has brought out the best in me and I hope I in him. I want him to always love me, and I know he feels the same so I will continually try to please him, as he does me. That I believe is the key to a successful marriage. Caring about the other person as much or more then you care about yourself, and make sacrifices. I hope everyone can be so lucky as to have a love like ours.
The End
Oh, I guess I should mention what a fantastic father Christopher is. I often feel the kids love him more then me. He is the nice parent, the one that plays with the kids.
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