Well we are almost through week three of clean eating and it really isn't all that bad. The hardest part is cutting flour out of my diet completely. It is still there to a degree. I do however use rye flour most of the time, and grind my own flax and oats as a flour substitute. I bake almost daily for my kids so they will have healthyish, homemade snacks. I add good grains and some veggies to some of my baking, and even though I have to double every muffin recipe I never double the sugar quantity. They are starting to notice and rebel a bit. Today I added a minimal amount of sugar to peanut butter and chocolate chip muffins, that also contained wheat germ and partial rye flour. Lilli accused me of adding quinoa and gagged her muffin down through tears. It only took her an hour and a half, but, mean as I am, I made her eat it. I am sure they will adjust to the sugar cutback eventually. The most recent time I made granola I didn't add any sugar or honey, just molasses. Only Chris and I eat that though.
Another thing that Chris and I go without is salt. I use it occasionally when necessary in baking but otherwise we haven't owned a salt shaker like ever. I've found that I now notice salt heavily in everything, even cereal and boxed cookies. Now, with the clean eating, I do have little treats or it would be no fun at all. I eat a few chocolate chips or a mint truffle Hershey Kiss daily. It's a tiny bit of chocolate and I don't feel too guilty about it. What I have noticed most about eating clean is I don't get bloated nearly as much as I used to. I think that is due to cutting most of the gluten out of my diet. Last week when I ate the homemade pasta I got bloated and it made me realize how rare it happens these days. Anyone who has spent a significant amount of time with me knows I can bloat to look 4 or 5 months pregnant. I've even convinced my kids of it a time or two. As well, my crazy inflammatory bowl disease hasn't acted up in awhile. So Chris and I, but mostly I, will continue on with clean eating. Oh yeah, and several weeks ago I made a huge batch of brownies and gave them away, and only kept a little one for myself. I put it in the freezer to save as a treat, but every time I think about it I can't bring myself to eat it. I imagine all that sugar going straight to my midsection.
 So on top of trying to eat well Chris and I have been trying to exercise more. It is really hard in this cold weather, especially for Chris. It is nearly impossible for him to ride his bike to work or run outside on his lunch break. He runs up and down the stairs in his building and does weights in the evening though. I am lucky enough to have a gym membership at a gym that offers lots of fun classes. I really do mean fun in a weird sort of way. The classes are so brutally hard but I am motivated being in a room full of like minded people. I like feeling capable and strongish. I'm getting there. I have never been athletic in the slightest and always felt scrawny and wimpy growing up. I feel better about myself when I exercise. There may be things about our appearances that we could only change through plastic surgery but being physically fit is something we can all do, and it feels good too. I've never heard anyone say "Boy, I wish I didn't go to the gym and work out today." Unless they did something they shouldn't have and injured themselves. Right now I am aiming for 5 days a week of working out. I know it's not perfect but as is I feel guilty going out all those evenings and leaving Chris to deal with the kids at their crankiest. He is very supportive though and if there is an evening when I can't go out I stay home and do a bit of yoga.
  Okay, new topic. I found this blog and fell in love with it: www.thefrugalgirl.com This woman has all these wonderful, frugal living ideas that have got me so inspired. One of my new years goals was to live on a better budget, and there are some great tips on her website. I'm doing meal planning for the week, and I've set up a grocery budget of about $125 or less a week. Eating less packaged and more whole foods will help I think. I have discovered how to make my own cleaning supplies, and laundry soap. Also better for the environment. She has a recipe for homemade yogurt that I am so excited to make. Cost is about $4 for a months worth and no additives. It is a good thing that I love to make and create. It is so satisfying to be self-reliant. And I can share all these ideas in my new calling at church. I've started making bread for the kids as well. They are having to adjust to that as well, and it is definitely time consuming without a bread maker. I really hope I can stick with this. I really think it will be good for us, and anyone really.

Miete and Lilli displaying their latest artwork.

I love homeschool. I have been given a hard time about it recently. I was told that the reason my girls struggle is because I am not doing as good a job teaching them as the public school system would. They were in it, and it was worse. Also that I am coddling them and not encouraging independence. I was told that it was my lack of faith in my children that was holding them back. I felt sick and upset about this conversation. It made me feel like a bad parent who wasn't making the best possible decision for my children. Nobody knows our children like we do and I do not believe I am stifling my children. I am doing what I feel is best for my children and I am not judging anyone else for their education choices. I really believe that there are different methods for different children and if your children can excel in the public school system then that is great. I don't want to doubt myself. i don't do this because I think it is superior or fun, I do it because my kids were lost and floundering in school. I have a daughter who faked sick daily and hid in the nurses room at lunch time so she wouldn't have to play alone, and another one who spent an excessive amount of time hiding in the bathroom. This is just one of the many issues my girls had at school. I don't have time to get into it, but I am trying to comfort and reassure myself. I get easily shaken and distraught, and I dwell on things that people say. I need to forget about it and move on.
Anyways, I need to go to the gym now, so that is the end of that.


And one more, so I don't leave anyone out.